For the next five years I looked for Saint Germain. I walked and talked with him, as I was wont to do with Jesus Christ, who had been my Saviour since childhood—one in the right hand, one in the other. And yet, although all kinds of fantastic experiences had occurred, I wasn’t meeting him, I wasn’t finding him. But in that moment before I left for college when I saw his face I had a recall of an experience before this life, before I entered this life. It was the first time I had had such an experience.
I’d like to tell it to you because I think it relates to your own experience. I don’t think it’s very different from your own and I’d like to also say that I have a friend in Hollywood who’s making a film about people who have died, been pronounced dead for seconds or minutes or as long as a half-hour, have been restored to life and have begun to tell the experiences that they’ve had. And they’re so similar to this recall that I had so many years ago. And then there are those people with whom psychiatrists are working on the West Coast in regression—regressing them to childhood, using hypnosis, going back beyond childhood, probing the memory of the womb experience, then before the womb and then finally into previous lives.
There are so many documented cases of this, although orthodox medicine and psychiatry is not too happy about looking at them. They still are documented. They’re still piled high, these files of people. And they have very interesting experiences, very common embodiments, all kinds of experiences that key in to the psychology of this life, but they, too, are saying something about a similar occurrence that happened before birth in this life.
So here are two groups of people: one with an experience at the conclusion of a lifetime (those who have died and come back), and another group who is talking about the same thing before coming into embodiment. I think it’s noteworthy when we’re probing farther into consciousness to look at what other people are saying.
The experience recounted is that of standing in a great judgment hall before beings of light, masterful presences, whom upon seeing, they are one and all aware that they have always known these beings of light. They are very comfortable in their presence. There’s no such thing as the sense of being at a final judgment or a sense of a harsh court of cruel punishment or trembling in one’s boots before the threat of these beings. They are rather emissaries of God, whom some call “angels.”
The recall that I have is that I was standing before seven of these beings of light. It was very clear. It was replayed to me out of the records that are the records of akasha, because akasha is the entire etheric sheath of the planetary body. And anywhere you go upon the earth through akasha you can determine what has happened there and what has happened at inner levels. Some day scientists will read that sheath and prove the truth or the error of all men’s words.
Well, I stood before these seven beings and to my right was the ascended master Saint Germain, exactly as he is in this painting. Behind me were others, others of the ascended masters. It was a very important ceremony. I was standing, of course, in my full consciousness—you would call a mature, or adult, consciousness—and there I understood that these were emissaries of God. And I had come before them to review what would happen in this lifetime—what karma I was bringing with me, what family I would be born into, what religion, what place, what country, what would be the karma I would be required to balance and what the mission would be, what the offering of my life in the community would be.
Now, those same facts of awareness are given to each and every individual who takes embodiment upon earth. Most of us do not remember. I did not remember except for the master Saint Germain showing me.
He was standing to my right and I heard myself say, “Saint Germain, I vow to go to Earth and bring your teaching to God’s people.” With that I saw him place his hand upon my head and bless me, and then I remember entering this fiery vortex of light that looks like a tornado. And into this vortex of light, which is called the birth canal, this fully mature God-conscious being that we all are, without the densities of karma and the physical body, descends into the form prepared for it of which the soul has already been an evolving part since the moment of conception.
And so, coming into embodiment, one thing we all experience is the cutting off of memory by the great mercy of the Law. We have relatively short embodiments in this age because of our karma, because of our misuse of energy in past lives. We have ignored our teachers, our true teachers. We have ignored the inner voice of God and his commandments. And therefore our karma is ignorance of the Law, ignorance of the True Self, the true teachers and the understanding of who we have been.
It is necessary because most of us would be insane to have to be aware of ten, twenty or a hundred previous lives where we had all sorts of entanglements and problems and dying on the battlefields of the world, traumatic experiences. And so these are sealed in the subconscious. Each and every one of us holds within our subconscious being the records of the past because they are a part of our identity. And by and by, as life evolves, we get snatches of awareness, glimpses and gleams.
Sometimes we get into courses that show us that we have a complete understanding of a course before we hardly open the book. And that means we’ve worked on that, we’ve studied it, it’s a part of our causal body, it’s a part of our subconscious being. Sometimes we meet people we’ve known before. We have love at first sight, all kinds of experiences with people that are a process of the balancing of energy and a learning to experience over and over again until we come to the essential reality that all experience is the unfoldment of the God flame within us.
So one of the essential problems of being in this age is that question of a lost identity, of not knowing who we are or where we have come from. We find that this is reinforced by the doctrine and dogma of theology, which tells us that we are only born once and we only die once and that’s our total opportunity. Having cut off the past, then, we have no origins or roots. We are so concerned about going back a few generations to find out who we are, but what about the cosmic origin of this being that is actually free at inner levels, the being that seems now imprisoned in this house of clay? What about the origin, what about the contact with Elohim, what about the Sun behind the sun that is a source of energy that we’re not using at all?
This is what concerns me. And as El Morya says, “A people can rise no higher than their concept of God because their concept of God is their concept of their own identity. And as a result, they do not judge righteous judgment.” And specifically, he points to the decisions that are being made by this administration today or by those who represent the Russian people, or the Chinese or the people of Africa.
The decisions being made do not reflect righteous judgment because of an absence of the contact with the Inner Self and an absence of an understanding of the destiny of peoples, of their group karma, each and every nation having a very peculiar genius, a flame that is developed and something that we lay upon the altar of humanity as the supreme gift of ourself, the sacred labor of our hands and our heart and our consciousness.
In America we have a fiery destiny that comes from within. It is the developing of the flame of freedom itself at all levels of government, the economy, education, the uses of science and, above all, the freedom to discover what this soul is and how the soul may go through the process of transcending itself and finding itself in reality.
We have a gift to give, and yet we do not have an understanding of that gift or how it is implemented in the practical matters of political and economic theory. It’s the most amazing thing. But we are a people with an inner reality, a people all over the world, and yet we have been cut off.
And to me, this cutting off of a people from their source is the greatest threat to the security of our civilization. It is bringing upon us a downward spiral, a degeneration, an immorality, which I defined as “the failure to have the courage to be one’s True Self and to stand upon the truth of one’s inner being and upon the commitment one has made to the living God, to the Real Self within.” This to me is immorality. This to me is the cowardice that will destroy us from within.
Well, in my search for Saint Germain I went to school for five years. I was inspired by the ascended masters very definitely to major in political science and economics, which I did at Antioch College, at Boston University and George Washington University. In the course of being at Boston University I was determined I was going to find Saint Germain. As I was watching the events East and West, especially political events, I was more and more mindful of the fact that decisions were being made for you and me and for children unborn that would affect us for decades, that would limit our consciousness, our mobility, our resources. And it was disturbing me greatly because most people were not aware of the long-range, cumulative dangers that were coming upon us.
I remember a certain event that occurred in this hemisphere, and I simply sat down on the floor of my apartment in Boston and I started to cry. It was an intense moment for me. Millions of people were involved. And yet no one was seeing the inner reality of what was happening.
I became more and more desperate. I felt that finding Saint Germain was going to be the key to the understanding of this new age that was dawning upon us. And yet I wasn’t any nearer to finding him or his teaching and I said to myself: “It’s all your fault. You’re a miserable sinner. You’re rebellious. You’re condemned. You’ve done all these terrible things (which I imagined I had done), and that’s why Saint Germain isn’t coming to get you.” And I said to myself, “If the pupil is ready, the teacher appears. And he’s not appearing.”
Well, there had been about four occasions in my life when I had had an extraordinary contact with God. And those contacts had been based upon a desperate need, an intense love for people, individually and as a whole, a sense of helplessness, a crying out for justice and finally making a demand upon the cosmos itself and simply crying out to God and saying, “You have got to do something about this!”
And on those few occasions when all of this chemistry was together in one point, there would come an answer to a prayer that was like lightning. I would feel an energy go out of me to God, an energy returning, and the answer to the prayer instantly, within a few hours, a few days. Even if it was extraordinary, and heaven and earth had to be turned upside down, that answer came.
And I so marveled at this process that I was observing. I was observing a process, that the answer to the prayer was no longer significant. It was the fact that a process had taken place. And I said to myself, “If I can ever find out what happened in this interchange, I can present a key—a key that is something that can work time after time, that we don’t have to wait for to happen by happenstance.”
Well, this moment of being in Boston and not finding Saint Germain was just such an electric moment. All of the components were there. I was desperate. I could feel the decades turning and I could feel that there was imminent danger.
So, with all of the sense of belittlement and condemnation that grips all of us at one time or another, for real or imagined wrongs, I said to myself, “So what if you’re a sinner! So what if you’re unworthy! So what. So what. God in you is worthy! God in you is worthy to contact God in Saint Germain!” And it was like a light and a freedom. The whole wet blanket of that condemnation fell from me. And I stood, one, an heir of that God consciousness, knowing it was my rightful inheritance.
And I leaped from that place and I ran up a couple of flights of stairs to the roof of my apartment, and I threw my arms up into the blue sky and the billowing clouds—I can see them moving yet—and I cried into that sky and I said, “Saint Germain, I know you’re up there! You’ve got to come and get me now! I can’t wait any longer!” And I felt that light and that love go out from me and I felt it reach its mark. I knew he was there and I was at peace.
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Elizabeth Clare Prophet
I’m Stumping for the Coming Revolution in Higher Consciousness
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